Thursday, August 7, 2014

not gonna change my mind....

When I was five, and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said "a ballerina or a rock star." They usually laughed and said something like "well, you'll change your mind someday." 

When I was eleven and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said "a singer or actress." People brushed that off like "hmm, well, you have lots of time to think about it."

Throughout the past couple years, I've been a dancer, a singer, an actress, and a songwriter. I've kept telling myself "I'll change my mind, I'll change my mind, I'll change my mind..."  Part of that mindset is what people have told me; that I'll never make a living for myself if I go into the arts. The other part is just me being uncertain. I always think indefinitely because I like to keep options open. Plans and decisions I make are never permanent. Frankly, I'm uncomfortable with making something permanent and facing a definite decision. I always think something is going to change. But it never does. Then I wait and wait and wait, until one day I just have to trust my gut instinct. 

Now I'm 16, and I've decided to trust that instinct. I've been through a lot in the past two years and I've realized two very important things: I will only enjoy life if I'm doing what makes me happy and art is what makes me the happiest- whether it is singing, writing, acting, or dancing. I hate it when people say to me "you need to think about college" because trust me, I've thought about it endlessly. I have confronted many different majors and career choices and then I look at my life and always go back to this. My passion and talent for this is just too significant to ignore. An artist is who I am and always have been. I think it would be ridiculous to try and do anything else. 

I think my top career choice will always be a singer-songwriter but I also want to be a writer or an actress. If you're wondering why I haven't mentioned fashion.... fashion isn't a career to me, it's just a thing that's there that I like, that I do. I love fashion because I love it- there is really no artistic value beyond looking cute. Therefore, I couldn't make a career out of the lack of substance it has to offer. (I don't think fashion is materialistic- there's just not enough concept for me to grasp.)

And now, if someone says "well, have you looked at other options, you still have time to change your-" 
I say, "yes, I have looked at all the options, and NO, I'm going for this!" 


xx Signe

8 comments:

  1. As an aspiring musicain (I'm only 14) I get what your saying!

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  2. I have known my whole life, well since I was 3, that I wanted to sing for a career. Though the genre has changed, the dream hasn't. I understand that everyone's skeptical and against you making an unstable choice, but it's a passion, and passion will drive you to success. And careers aren't so straightforward anymore. You could find a job in the creative field you love that you haven't even heard of yet. As one of my professors recently told me, "You won't know what you're meant to do until you're doing it."

    Theatricality by Mariah

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  3. People are always going to be critical but you should definitely follow your dreams! You're so young, you have plenty of time to achieve them!

    prosecco in the park

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  4. I have always wanted to be a west end performer, my dream role is Eponine in Les Miserables! I doubt I'll ever get that far though, so i just enjoy performing as a hobby! I do hope it will unexpectedly spiral into success, but I have been told by many people to have a back up plan, which I will have to think about! Your blog is wonderful, I have followed you and it would mean the world to me if you could check out my blog and follow it (it only has 2 posts, I created it 2 days ago!) Thank you! Chloe xo

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  5. I wish you the best of luck in your career. Do what you love to do :)

    xx
    isa | http://stoerensexy.blogspot.be

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  6. Your determined attitude is refreshing, I think you'll go far with that alone :) I did have a massive change of heart when I was 17 from having always wanted to work with animals to realising that was more of a love and the career I wanted was in fashion. I doubt my stability of choice being fickle by nature, but I think when you have something to aim for you have nothing to lose x

    http://melly-go-round.blogspot.co.uk

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  7. Nobody should tell you what you can and cannot do with your time on this Earth! You sound very determined and head strong about your dreams and you have loads of time so there;'s absolutely no doubt you'll give what you love a good go, there's no point wasting your time on something you're not passionate about! I've wanted to be an author ever since I can remember and I'm halfway through writing my first novel, the looks on every one's faces who told you "You can't" will be worth it when you finally achieve what you said "i can" to!

    http://www.abigailalicex.com

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