It seems as if in our society, it is seen as better for girls and women to be displeased with the way they look. Thinking that you're pretty and being confident with how you look is automatically written off as conceited. It's like pretending to be unhappy with your appearance is the "safe" thing to do, and people who are actually happy with it feel shameful and are embarrassed to admit it.
I think this is horrible! No one should ever feel shame for liking the way they look! Because society has suggested this mindset, feeling pretty can feel like a sin.
I think this is a problem that goes very unnoticed. Girls are taught in school, often in a "guidance lesson", that feeling good about yourself is healthy. But when it actually comes to applying those values? In the real world, they are taught the opposite; from parents, from friends, from teachers.
I think that, in everyone's childhood, we've gotten all of these comments at least once:
Parent, after feeling proud of yourself: "Well, it's an improvement, but don't get too pleased with yourself, you still have a lot to work on..."
Parent, after making some big accomplishment in dance/sports/music etc: "Don't tell any of your friends. You don't want it to look like you're bragging."
Friend: "Omg did you see Susie take out her mirror in class today? I swear it's like she's obsessed with herself!"
Teacher, after getting a good test grade back: "NEVER tell anyone your score. Test grades are for you, not for other people."
"Humble" has turned into an extreme. The difference between being conceited and low self-esteem is so black and white, there's nothing in the middle. Being conceited and having low self-esteem are both unhealthy. The key is finding what's in the middle, and then maybe a little past that- finding balance.
First of all, it is NOT BAD to like your appearance. When it comes to liking yourself, this "sin" seems to be the worst. The truth is that I think it's actually very healthy because it means you won't be as needy for approval from others.
I think essentially, it is all about the way you word it. Obviously, don't go around saying "OMG I'm beautiful!" because all that will get you is a ton of eye-rolls. If you feel the need to make a comment, mention to your friend something like "hey, I did a pretty good job on my makeup today!" But don't be fishing for compliments, either. If you feel good about yourself, then you don't need anyone else's approval.
Well my rant is over!